Ken Uchikura Newsletter Vol. 44

Apology

I am not really happy about the way people give an apology. When you say “I am very sorry to people offended by my action.”, you are not apologizing to all, you are giving an apology only to people who are offended. That means, you are not 100% feeling apologetic. Unfortunately, I hear this a lot. Also, when people apologize, they are apologizing only because of the consequences resulted from their action. That means, they are not sorry for what they have done. They are sorry that they did not get away with it.

Also, when you explain why you did what you did...that should not be a part of the apology. That is an excuse and should not be a part of an apology. Here are the ways to give an apology, I read, that usually will be well received. I read this in the article* which is listed below.

1. An expression of regret.
2. An explanation of what went wrong.
3. An acknowledgment of responsibility.
4. A declaration of repentance.
5. An offer of repair.
6. A request for forgiveness.

The offer of an apology must be 100% and not motivated by the consequences. That is what is missing a lot of the time by the people giving an apology. You should not offer any apology if you are not truly sorry. If you believe in your action, you should have guts to stick with it whether you are popular or not.